Another Year Has Gone By
It's almost been a year since I sat in a diner with one of my best friends. Okay, it was just a Johnny Rockets, but you get the picture.
It was a cloudy January afternoon.
It also happened to be my 25th birthday.
We talked about where we are in our lives, our dreams for the future and that this would be our year, in between bites of chicken strips and fries.
There would be no more sitting around on our ideas and hopes. This was the time to move.
And I think all in all, this year did just that for me. Twenty-Seventeen was one of my favorite years ever.
If I wanted something, I tried it. If I wanted to dream it, I would. I laughed a little more, I was more present, I loved more and I learned to let myself be happy a little more. I had adventures, if I didn't want to go, I said 'no,' (self-care wise, not just because I didn't feel like it), I said 'yes,' to things I was a little nervous about and I'm still LEARNING how to speak up about what I want.
No one gets to tell you how big you can dream. I watched a talk earlier in the year from one of my favorite bloggers/motivational speakers, Rachel Hollis, called "The Power of No," and it inspired me like nothing else before to stop waiting.
No one else cares if your dream comes true, so it's up to you to work for it and make it happen. Oh, how life-changing that was. Combined with the conversations I'd had with friends, seeing "La La Land" and taking Shonda Rhimes' TV writing class, this was a year of dreaming and doing. Not just thinking the things I want in life aren't to be desired, but rather this is the time to go for it. I wanted to explore more of the things that I love and spent more time developing ideas, instead of just outlining them in a notebook that I would lose five minutes from jotting them down.
I traveled alone to a new place, Santa Fe, where I worked on a skill/craft I need for work, photography. But, I discovered so much more while I was there, like my identity in Christ. Learning to love and thrive on adventure, spontaneity and even getting to know strangers or people that I'd bump into on the street or in a coffee shop.
I had a lot of fun, I worked hard, I got mad, I was happier than ever, I felt pain more than ever and when things were good, I celebrated and rejoiced in God's faithfulness. In the words of Taylor Swift, "I'm doing better than I ever was." I daydreamed and I was in the moment more. I let myself be known and I got to know others around me and their hearts.
I left 2016 with a broken heart - full of broken dreams and wishes that didn't come true. Friendships that I wasn't quite sure where they were heading or whether they would at all. How do you move on from that? I was determined to, but it still hurt. It was a good place to start over; to reexamine my life and think about what I wanted, the people I wanted to surround myself with, the kind of risks I wanted to take and learn to be more strategic about my future.
Highlights:
Turning 25 (after my quarter-life crisis freakout ended, it turned out to not be so bad after all).
Getting a Universal Studios pass and making several trips with one of my best friends throughout the year.
"La La Land" - everything about it. Don't judge me.
Touring Warner Brothers Studios and Paramount Studios again.
Santa Fe for a photography workshop (It was my first time traveling alone, so it was a huge thing for me).
Heart to hearts and lunches with my work mom.
Concerts: Lea Michele, Lady Antebellum, Tim McGraw and Faith Hill, Haim, John Mayer, Blake Shelton
Getting a quote from Blake Shelton for the article I was working on about his tour, and getting tickets to review the show.
Attending the "Battle of the Sexes" premiere - Almost meeting Steve Carell (he waved and said 'hi') and Emma Stone (got an autograph from her! Thanks, dad!)
Paley Fests: "This is Us" and "Scandal"
Permanency for my role at work!!!
Completing the Shonda Rhimes TV writing Masterclass and signing up for a few others.
Getting more comfortable with photography at work.
Completing several video editing projects at work for big events!
Getting accepted into the Vanguard University's online master's program for Leadership Studies.
Giving the message/leading my small group for the first time (I spoke about identity in Christ).
Pouring into friendships.
Reconnecting with old friends and best friends.
Getting an annual pass to Disneyland and several Disney trips this year (Halloween and twice at Christmas).
I read a lot (which was one of my resolutions last year).
A full team at work; growing and developing our office in social media and various other things.
Shadowing a reporter at one of our local news station and getting to know various people on the other side of the media world.
Writing more - personally and professionally.
Joining my old high school's Alumni Association board and getting more involved.
Experienced part of the Solar Eclipse.
Saying 'yes' to things before I fully had a chance to understand what saying 'yes' meant (within reason, of course) with friendships and professional endeavors.
Starting this Wix site to post my interviews and past articles in one space (still a work in progress, but it's finally here).
Trivia with college friends (although we haven't done it in awhile).
...too many others to name.
I won't pretend 2017 was easy, or some sort of fairytale, like the pictures above might show, because it wasn't. It was hard. For my family and for so many people around the country.
There was a lot of crying and many mornings I didn't know if I could get out of bed or face the day. But, you get up, you show up and that's where your faith grows. In the midst of those challenges and through my bleary eyes full of salty tears, I still felt peace and tried to find my joy, because God had me every step of the was. HE MADE A WAY when it felt like there wouldn't be a way out. He always provided just in time and here we are on the last page of 2017 still standing.
Twenty-seventeen was just scratching the surface of me finding my voice and who I want to be.
I don't necessarily have regrets, but lessons learned and moments I hope to redeem in the New Year, especially when it comes to being bold and speaking up about my beliefs and others' expectations of my life.
Tonight, we turn another page. Tomorrow will start off just like any other day, but I hope by the end of the next chapter, it's much more extraordinary. I hope it's whimsical and takes all of us to new heights. I hope we find the courage to say what we need to, to ask the tough questions (even if we get the wrong answers back), I hope we push ourselves to do the things we want and will open us to new opportunities. But, I also hope we take care of ourselves and know our limits, and I hope we learn to appreciate every moment we're given with loved ones. I hope we give it all we've got and smile, dance and sing a little more while we make our way through the year.
Here's to 2018!